So it's official!!! In the past few months, I have been making all of the arrangements to have the Duodenal Switch! In my last post, I talked about my consultation. After that, I went through the standard stuff. I had to see my Psychiatrist to get clearance and submit that back to Dr. Davis' office. It took me a few weeks to get an appointment to see her, but she didn't have any problems clearing me for surgery. Within 5 days of faxing over my letter of clearance, I got an email telling me I had been approved for surgery! I was at work when I received the message and I wanted to cry!
Then came the hard part. How much was it going to cost me??? They called to discuss all of the payment details. My insurance would only cover 80%, so that left me to cover the remaining 20%. All during the conversation, I'm seeing these random green numbers flying around in front of me like a bad Matrix code. After adding up all the expenses, I'm looking at $3500, at least... So we've been saving since and I'm hopeful that we will have what we need.
After that came scheduling! I have a date! October 11, 2012!!! 10.11.12!!! Couldn't have planned it better myself. 57 days until my date!
I'm excited and nervous. This is uncharted territory for me and I'm not sure what to expect. I have so many goals, but at the same time, I don't want to be unrealistic. I've been on message boards where people really down talk people who had the sleeve first and then have the DS afterward. Stating that they don't lose or they lose very slowly. I can't afford to be one of those people.
6 weeks ago, I fell and fractured my ankle. I was so lucky that it wasn't completely broken or that it would have required surgery to fix. But I've been in a cast for the last 6 weeks and limping around has put a horrible strain on my entire body. I can't stand for more than 10 minutes. I can't walk for more than 10 minutes. The cast comes off tomorrow and I will be so scared to step on the scale on Friday and see what damage I've done by not being able to move. The horrible thing is that it's not my ankle that hurts so much when I move around. It's everything else. My knees, hips, and back... Of course I can feel the strain it puts on my ankle, but it's minor compared to everything else.
That is a big reason to need this. Next time this happens (and it will probably happen again...), I might not be so lucky as a simple fracture. And at 345 pounds, I don't want to risk it. But more so, I want to be the person I was 3 years ago. When I was at my lowest weight, I was outgoing and confident. I want to be that person again. My goal was to never be skinny. I just wanted to be comfortable with myself and be the person I knew I was inside. That was the closest I ever got to her and even then, she wasn't all the way out. So that's going to be my new goal this time. I want to get to her and hold on. I want to find the girl I buried in all of these protective layers and tell her it's ok now. The coast is clear. You are more than capable of taking control now. No one hurts you unless you give them permission to. And most of all, you deserve to be happy.
I have a goal. I have a mission. I will get there.
I will post pictures... : )
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